A way of life? or Identity

My work life as a Medical Laboratory Assistant and when you take into the ratio of male MLA's to female MLA's there is a vast and distinctive difference because this particular role is usually filled by woman, it is underpaid and we are distinctly undervalued and it has always been like that since the post of MLA's was created.
My home life is not unusual by any means but it is not easy and once again its a common situation for the single parent to be female on a low wage struggling to survive and I am not an isolated group because this situation happens to many woman from many different backgrounds.
So within my creative work I look at my life and how my work interprets that particular arena and how I have extended this by attempting to visually creative some form of dialogue regarding my daughter's particular generation and this particular age group and the emotional and physical issues is hard to define.

However I have found a quote that for me does sum up how I feel about my work at this moment in time.

Lucy R Lippard argument is used within a discussion regarding feminist art in the book Art and Feminism, Lippard declares that feminist art is "Neither a style nor a movement' but rather a value system, a revolutionary strategy, a way of life".(1982:20)

Therefore I want to ask the question or rather am I not understanding Art and Identity by feeling that maybe Identity is a way of life for individuals and how they live and what is reflected within that sphere 'Identity'. 

Any moving on the work I have recently made, I was incredibly impressed with the level of work being produced by other MA students and I have felt very inadequate and awestruck, and I have been inspired to create work using ink to sketch with and I have only produced these two images, what is interesting about these pieces is that I have attempted not to copy the photographic images but to be inspired by them from memory therefore they are not a true representation and in doing this the reality has been removed and the essence of the image remains.   

I have continued to create more ink sketches using a variety of coloured inks and I started off looking at creating ink images of Emma's face.

Due to comments made by students and also tutors I am aware of how I compositionally positions the image on the paper and how they differ from when I am taking photographs.

Recognising that when I use different mediums I see visually a different way of positioning of the object/person. This is a very interesting area for me to look at as the MA continues.

I have looked at the work of Marlene Dumas and I am interested in how she uses the gradient of colour within her work, and within these ink drawings I have been experimenting with certain colours. As you can see above in the variety of ink sketches that I have created.
Furthermore I have attempted to create a large piece once again using the blueish hues.

 

 

 

Within the piece above the looseness of the brushstrokes seem to be scratchy and the body seems mishaped and the stance is awkward, the eyes are averted, this piece is difficult and I feel as a viewer very uncomfortable to look at which is an element which fits within this image.

 

This module has been difficult and complex and time has been a terrible issue on top of everything else, I hope that I can develop from this module and learn from the issues which have arisen.

 

 I created this finale piece and I know that it is not like the paintings that I usually make, but the contrasting elements of the oil paints and watercolour inks creates a nightmarish element and the face is distorted and not much like my daughter's.
However there is a finality to this piece which for me is a positive conclusion to this module.

The work in this module has been based around the book 'Art and Today' and the chapter 'Art amd Identity' by Eleanor Heartney because Identity has been underlying my throughout this module, I started of exploring that develop and mould my identity through society in which I live, our lives change and shift and so does our identity. I found that when myself and my daughter collaborated that this work was about defining ourselves as individuals and how difficult this is at the age of fourteen as you develop into adulthood leaving childhood behind.

Considering the work I have created during this module I have thought about how I would like them to be displayed during the assessment when taking all of these images and what they mean and how the viewer will see these pieces.
So I have put a note into the parcel which will be sent off to the OCA, and in I have asked that the painting by hung up and either side I want the ink drawings pinned up, furthermore I have printed off 20 photocopies of my daughter and I want these scattered onto the floor leading up to the images, so the viewer will have to either avoid stepping or actually step onto these images. Because these images regarding Emma are about how we as adults often ignore or avoid any confrontation regarding teenagers, we prejudge what they may be interested in and what affects these individuals during this stage in their lives.

Finally Caroline and I have discussed who the photographs of my daughter is disturbing and fboth myself and Caroline realised that these images have a sense of the images of Leah Betts (b.1977 d.1995) there was an image of her on a ventilator which raised the profile of the drug ecstasy and also the images of Rachel Whitear (b.1979 d.2000) she died from a heroin overdose, which led to a large scale anti-drugs campaign.  


Leah Sarah Betts (1 November 1977^[1] – 16 November 1995   

Collaborating with Emma

I realise that I have not produced work to the level of the MA through my paintings, however I do believe the photography from the last module is of a good standard, However I missed painting therefore I decided to continue using text within the work but extending into the realm of painting. This has not worked for me.
There is a problem that still exists I need to create/make/do..

Emma my daughter then offered to be a model for this particular module and we decided that we would start off using the mirror as the instrument within the work to begin.

 

 

I not only took images of Emma with the mirror we also emptied the shower room and I introduced a stool for Emma to sit on.

 



 

 

Once I had taken a series of images I then introduced the chair that I sit it whilst using the computer. I could use these images as paintings they are interesting positions.

 



 

Once again I returned to the mirror as a tool, and the images produced I feel have something tangible with the viewer's view point which makes a connection.

 

Once I had introduced the chair into the small space within the shower room and once I had taken images of Emma within the mirror, Emma seemed to develop her own idea of what she felt would make interesting images.

Emma then began to place herself within the space taking control of the images being taken. The chair became part of the work, this piece of furniture not only became a prop but also was integral part of these particular images as the mirror has been in previous images.
  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This week there was an incident within my home and the photographs above are quite frightening to look at because of the situation that occured in reality. But without this situation that    occured this images are still disturbing and are something that I believe have a theoritical basis.

 

 
Even without working into this images there is something potent and I believe the viewer will gain insight in these images, there is depth and a sense of the teenage identity that is revealed within this images.

The next two images are photographs which were taken earlier of myself a few weeks ago. The first image is when the ink was running low and I like the lightness and the tonal colours I have used, I have also added pen scribbled onto the figures.

 

 

Again this is another image taken from an earlier session that I took of myself I have printed this image using photography paper and washed over with water and brown water colour was added.

 

 

 

The following images are the worked on images of Emma I have used a variety of inks and pen scratched into the images. In some of these images I have added brighter colours to some of the images I enjoy how they runs over the physical aspect of Emma. I attempted to wash over those put the ink didn't spread.    

 

 

The next few images have been washed over using watercolour inks and I enjoy the contrast of the two figures. I have attempted to use different colours but I don't these particular images work.

 

 

Out of all the images that I have worked on I do prefer the darker colours that I have used, however I like the washed out tonal colours.

 

The last three images that I have added are interesting because they are printed short on ink so they have a lighter washed out feel and the colour is a blandish blue result, The colours added are brighter and interesting. I do feel this last session and the work I added to the images have pushed the work further on than it had been a few months ago.

Angela asked if Emma would her opinion on this collaboration and Emma agreed and below is her statement. 

  

 

Emma’s Statement

          I’m used to my Mum doing art, and over the years she has sometimes used.

          The photos taken of me were taken in my Mum’s shower room, it’s a small room and it has a full length mirror which used to belong to our old neighbour in East Sussex, he died this year and I miss him, but the

mirror reminds me of Norman each time I look into it. I also have a picture of me and him from when I was little.

          I hate my picture being taken especially at parties, as I don’t like the way I look and I always feel really uncomfortable.

          I don’t really know why I offered to take part in these photos it but it didn’t bother me because I don’t know really know the people who are on this course and my mum needed me to do it so that she could pass her course.

I liked how my mum said that I could wear what I liked but I only put a small amount of make up on.

Mum cleared the shower room, and I started off by sitting on a stool and Mum took images of me where my reflection could be seen. Then Mum brought her chair into the room, and I sat on that and let Mum take the pictures. I then got a bit bored of just sitting so that’s when I thought I would go onto the floor.

The photos of me are okay, I prefer them in black and white and they are better after Mum has worked into them because me makes me

look sullen. I like the way my eyes look big.

The photos of me on the floor makes me look boxed in as if I can’t escape, I think these photos show a teenager who has lots to say but doesn’t or can’t because she is experiencing different things every day and sometimes too many things happen so she feels closed in.

Also these photos are about girls who feel they will never be cool and yet there are bits about them that are good but they are made to feel that they will never completely fit in by their peers.

 

 

I have found Emma's statement really interesting, and what she has written is quite an eye opener, I do agree with what Emma has stated especially the last two paragraphs. She is experiencing so many things and the next few years there will be many times when she will have to make choices, some will be the right choices and some will be choices that she will regret, but these are all things that she has to experience.